Anecdote No. 5: A Hunger for Humble Pie
A few searches through Merriam-Webster’s dictionary left me, at best, with a somewhat vague yet unsatisfying definition of what it means to be humble. Apparently, it is synonymous with meekness, modesty, and lowliness all of which imply thinking less of oneself or being deficient in the rank of some hierarchy. Literally. The exact words were “ranking low in some hierarchy.” The entry for meek confused me all the more with its apparently contradictory definitions: “characterized by patience or long-suffering” and immediately after “deficient in spirit and courage.” How can one be deficient in spirit or courage when one clearly has the patience to endure hardship? Talk about con-fu-sing. So, what does it mean to be humble - to know and show true humility - and why does it matter?
Perhaps the first step towards understanding the importance and necessity of true humility in living a life of faith is to examine pride or vanity, its opposite, and something we all know a thing or two about.
I have always been captivated by French philosopher Blaise Pascal’s profound thoughts on the issue of pride: “Vanity is so anchored in the heart of man that...those who write against it want to have the glory of having written well; and those who read it desire the glory of having read it.” In other words, he appears to be saying that pride is so deeply ingrained in the fibre of our humanity that it is near impossible to do anything in true humility, however noble our intentions may be. We can’t escape the clutches of pride even with our humblest human efforts. Our actions are always, to a degree, motivated by self-interest whether it is humble recognition, modest self-esteem, the satisfaction that hard work, helping others, or being humble in a situation gives us, or even being admired or esteemed for our humility. And let’s face it, those of us who are considered by others – and who consider ourselves - as quite humble compared to others (ironically, even in making such a comparison do we reflect that hint of pride) are shamed by those moments when pride gets the better of us. We’re no better than the next person whom we consider ourselves better than.
Being a wife brings out these moments more often than not. It’s crazy how hard it is to admit I’m wrong and to say sorry because I know it’s my fault. All this to the one I love. That’s pride at its best. So how does one embrace and exercise true humility amidst the natural inclinations of pride? Living by faith is itself living a life of humility to say the least. God requires us to “walk humbly” with him and among all people (Micah 6:8). What does this actually mean and how is it possible given the pride that we all struggle with?
True humility is seen in the life of Jesus Christ and it is his humility that God’s righteous people are called and set apart to imitate. In Philippians 2 we learn that God himself in the person of Jesus “made himself nothing” and became “obedient to death on a cross.” God – the Creator of the universe, the Most High, the Beginning and the End - became a man. He took on the appearance and form of a person, a servant of all people, and though he was in nature God, Jesus did not even consider equality with God as something to be grasped. Wow. How is that even possible? It’s unfathomable, that’s for sure.
So, what implications does this have for my life and yours? It’s impossible to live by faith with pride in one’s heart or head. Christ and pride are at war with one another. Both desire the opposite and, to put it simply, cannot be reconciled. One must die for the other to live. Imitating Christ’s humility first and foremost requires a complete surrender to the presence of God – the Holy Spirit – in one’s heart and life. Often, daily. Isaiah 66:2 says “This is the one I esteem: he who is humble and contrite in spirit, and trembles at my word.” Only the Holy Spirit can create a humble and contrite and repentant spirit. Only the Spirit can create reverence for God's Word. Moreover, only the humble can be guided towards doing what is right (Psalm 25:9).
Living in humility requires life in community – both of unbelievers and believers. The same book (Philippians) that implores the attitude that we are to have (Christ’s humility) includes the situations that would require us to demonstrate humility. Looking not only to our interests but also to the interests of others implies that our humility should impact others, everyone around us. Not that we act so that others will see our humility and praise it and us (that's pride fueling our actions). But rather, that others would see Christ-likeness in our attitude and actions and be impacted for the better by it (to the end that they would come to know Christ, too). When Paul says “be like-minded, [have] the same love, [be] one in spirit and purpose” this implies exercising humility within the brotherhood of believers – the church. After all, we are His church.
Friend, living humbly is next to impossible to do without the Holy Spirit and further, without a conscious surrender to the Holy Spirit - to the very spirit of Jesus who is our ultimate example of humility. And we all need to practice some humility in our life - in our marriages, in our friendships, in our workplace, with siblings, around parents, to those we would otherwise consider 'lesser' to us. Humility isn’t natural to human nature as pridefulness is. In fact, our culture sees it as weakness (but, that’s another blog). God’s righteous people, however, know that only with a humble heart can one truly live a life that is pleasing to God and one that will build others up in what matters. So, take a bite (or two, or three) of that Humble Pie – made by The Chef himself. You’ll find that a little bit goes a long way.
“Continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.” – Philippians 2:12b-13
10.25.2011
It's funny (and somewhat ironic).
Life with a baby has become a manageable and utterly enjoyable routine; and I'm glad for it after the tough beginning of having a baby. Over the past month, Mischa and I (and Dale when he's home) have worked out a predictable pattern of feeding times, napping times, activity times, bedtime, and some spontaneous outings here and there. To say the least, Mischa is a very good baby and we're comfortable. It's a good thing!
Ironically, as I was browsing a few of my previous months' entries I couldn't help but laugh a little at my random vents on how tough Mischa was, how I had such lack of sleep, and how I couldn't get as much done in and around the house as I can now. The ironic thing was, even though I was running on near empty somehow I had the drive, the insight, the passion to blog - and to blog about God's Word (My blog series). And I did just that amidst my crazy days. Not that I don't still have that desire, but it's ironic how now that I'm getting a restful sleep pretty much every night, now that I can let Misch hang out in her crib without attending to her immediately, now that I have legit down time, my efforts to continue my series have dwindled a bit and, I'll admit, some of the passion is gone. Now, when I have a moment I'm washing the dishes (ENDLESS dishes), doing laundry, watching TV, reading, or preparing for Mischa's next meal. Unlike before, I'd be infront of my computer screen itching to write God's newest revelations.
I find the same goes for life. When things are difficult and it is apparent that only by God's strength can we go on, we're all about seeking God, persisting in our prayers, etc. When things are well, we slack off in our pursuit of living in God's presence, pursuit of his will, his answers to prayer. We get comfortable and in that mode easily lose ourselves to complacency.
I'm thankful that in writing this post I've confronted myself with this issue. Onward to change!
Ironically, as I was browsing a few of my previous months' entries I couldn't help but laugh a little at my random vents on how tough Mischa was, how I had such lack of sleep, and how I couldn't get as much done in and around the house as I can now. The ironic thing was, even though I was running on near empty somehow I had the drive, the insight, the passion to blog - and to blog about God's Word (My blog series). And I did just that amidst my crazy days. Not that I don't still have that desire, but it's ironic how now that I'm getting a restful sleep pretty much every night, now that I can let Misch hang out in her crib without attending to her immediately, now that I have legit down time, my efforts to continue my series have dwindled a bit and, I'll admit, some of the passion is gone. Now, when I have a moment I'm washing the dishes (ENDLESS dishes), doing laundry, watching TV, reading, or preparing for Mischa's next meal. Unlike before, I'd be infront of my computer screen itching to write God's newest revelations.
I find the same goes for life. When things are difficult and it is apparent that only by God's strength can we go on, we're all about seeking God, persisting in our prayers, etc. When things are well, we slack off in our pursuit of living in God's presence, pursuit of his will, his answers to prayer. We get comfortable and in that mode easily lose ourselves to complacency.
I'm thankful that in writing this post I've confronted myself with this issue. Onward to change!
10.20.2011
Call Me Crazy
Mischa started eating pureed food almost a month ago and as a result has not been desiring to breast feed as much although she still does about four times a day (before her meals - although I really should start thinking about and doing the reverse...as much as I don't want to just yet). I'm wrestling with the fact that soon she won't want to at all because she'll either be too full or be drinking from a sippy cup or a bottle and not needing me to provide her with sustenance anymore. Call me crazy but I don't want her to wean so soon! I love breastfeeding (didn't think I'd ever say that - but it's true!) and that she depends on me in that way for soothing, comfort, & closeness. I will definitely miss it when she stops. Plus it's super convenient, nutritious, and no prep is required (other than thinking about the type of blouse to wear before going out). For those soon-to-be moms out there reading: breastfeed! Granted, it might be stressful at first when they are learning to latch on and you need to wrap your head around the idea of the little babe sucking milk from you, and it might hurt or tickle initially, but it's worth it. Much more than what the nurses, doctors, or lactation consultants tell you regarding the benefits breastmilk contains, it's a connection with your baby that's like nothing else. If you can and while you can, do it. You won't regret it for a second :-)
10.06.2011
Mischa Milestone
Almost every day, Dale and I at some point in our evening stop and say to each other: "I can't believe we have a baby!" We have made up so many songs to accompany the little things we do with her throughout the day. We need to make a record of them so she doesn't forget!
(Mischabebebebebe, Mischatotsbebe, How was your day/sleep? Exercise in the Morning, Mischa the Gold Prospector)
I still can't believe it and it's been almost 6 months! I already get sad thinking about leaving her and going back to work (and that's still six months away!).
Anyhow, to her most recent milestone (this week, actually) - sleeping through the night! On Monday night she surprised us by sleeping for 11 hours! She didn't get up at her usual 4am wake up to eat, but instead slept right through until 7am. What a champ! (I, in turn, got 7 hours of sleep which has not happened since before she was born). I attribute this new ability to her starting solids a couple of weeks ago. She loves her oat cereal! Banana and green beans not so much (I figure since she scrunches up her little face and eyes as if to say "uh, this tastes weird"); but if it's mixed with her oats she doesn't really notice.
*Sigh*
Our little girl is growing too fast!
(Mischabebebebebe, Mischatotsbebe, How was your day/sleep? Exercise in the Morning, Mischa the Gold Prospector)
I still can't believe it and it's been almost 6 months! I already get sad thinking about leaving her and going back to work (and that's still six months away!).
Anyhow, to her most recent milestone (this week, actually) - sleeping through the night! On Monday night she surprised us by sleeping for 11 hours! She didn't get up at her usual 4am wake up to eat, but instead slept right through until 7am. What a champ! (I, in turn, got 7 hours of sleep which has not happened since before she was born). I attribute this new ability to her starting solids a couple of weeks ago. She loves her oat cereal! Banana and green beans not so much (I figure since she scrunches up her little face and eyes as if to say "uh, this tastes weird"); but if it's mixed with her oats she doesn't really notice.
*Sigh*
Our little girl is growing too fast!
The Importance of Being Earnest
No, not the trivial comedy by Oscar Wilde but the attitude of earnesty when it comes to what's important in this life. Namely, God, family, people and in that order.
Not working for the past six months has allowed me to take a step back and analyze how I spend my days and time. Granted, I did just have a baby and a lot of my time (especially in the beginning) was put towards learning how to care for a baby and then actually caring for her basic needs which is essentially what motherhood is in the first three months. But now that I've gotten a grip on raising an infant (no longer a newborn), I really can't use 'just had a baby' as an excuse for not making the most of each day. Especially being off from work. Hence, regardless of what season of life you find yourself in, it is still of utmost importance to be earnest in the way of seeking God and His righteousness, loving the people God has given to you as family, and extending His love to all people.
I've been mulling over the fact that I haven't built many long-standing relationships with people outside of my church family; and this bugs me. Back home this wasn't an issue really, perhaps because into adulthood I retained a lot of highschool friendships with many people. There was history there which, I guess, made the grounds on which to build a friendship more substantial in some way. But since moving to Calgary, I've found that the only place I've made (and make) new friendships is at work. And it's also at work that these friendships are usually maintained. It doesn't quite help that I'm not permanent at any school, although that really shouldn't matter when a solid friendship is formed. But like any relationship, time needs to be invested regularly in order for the relationship to grow. That, and an openness of sorts. And if that's not really happening, then relationships become polite acquaintance, nothing much else. Many of my short friendships with the people I've made since moving here (outside of the church, that is) have turned into polite acquaintance. I guess to some extent that is bound to happen. But what I am struggling to come to grips with is how I've approached these friendships. How did I (do I) allow the Lord to speak through me, shine through me, in these friendships? When opportunities arose (arise), how did (do) I make the most of them?
To put it plainly, I am not earnest when it comes to sharing the gospel message of God's love to others. This is a difficult admittance, even to myself. I can effectively teach the Bible to believers, proclaim God's love in song, exhort God's people to worship. But, unless an obvious opportunity to share my faith to an unbeliever presents itself, I don't. Instead of creating opportunities, I wait for them. And it is in simply waiting that nothing happens. As believers, we are encouraged to "pray without ceasing" (1 Thess. 5:17). But that does not always mean to pray and just sit and wait. Sometimes, it does. But other times, and more often, it means to pray while simultaneously allowing God to work in us and through us; and in doing so our very attitude and conduct become God's answer to our prayers (Philippians 2:12).
But if I'm not earnest, nothing - really - will change.
St. Francis of Assisi is once quoted as saying: "Preach the gospel at all times. When necessary, use words." While I wholeheartedly agree with the motive and essence of this statement, I can't reduce words to secondary importance in the endeavor to preach the gospel. If I do, I will never learn to open my mouth but instead simply trust that my life alone will do all the preaching necessary for a person to understand salvation and God's love. But Jesus's very life, not only his words, teaches us otherwise. Both word and deed are of equal value when it comes to the Christian message; they go hand in hand. The Bible teaches us that "faith comes from hearing, and hearing by the word of Christ" (Romans 10:17).
So I'm left with this: I need to continue to pray, pray, pray...and move. I pray for opportunities, but I also need to create those opportunities. I need to make the phone call, write the message, send the text, take out for coffee or lunch or dinner, host a meal, etc.
Time to seriously invest my time and money in people who need to hear and know Christ.
Not working for the past six months has allowed me to take a step back and analyze how I spend my days and time. Granted, I did just have a baby and a lot of my time (especially in the beginning) was put towards learning how to care for a baby and then actually caring for her basic needs which is essentially what motherhood is in the first three months. But now that I've gotten a grip on raising an infant (no longer a newborn), I really can't use 'just had a baby' as an excuse for not making the most of each day. Especially being off from work. Hence, regardless of what season of life you find yourself in, it is still of utmost importance to be earnest in the way of seeking God and His righteousness, loving the people God has given to you as family, and extending His love to all people.
I've been mulling over the fact that I haven't built many long-standing relationships with people outside of my church family; and this bugs me. Back home this wasn't an issue really, perhaps because into adulthood I retained a lot of highschool friendships with many people. There was history there which, I guess, made the grounds on which to build a friendship more substantial in some way. But since moving to Calgary, I've found that the only place I've made (and make) new friendships is at work. And it's also at work that these friendships are usually maintained. It doesn't quite help that I'm not permanent at any school, although that really shouldn't matter when a solid friendship is formed. But like any relationship, time needs to be invested regularly in order for the relationship to grow. That, and an openness of sorts. And if that's not really happening, then relationships become polite acquaintance, nothing much else. Many of my short friendships with the people I've made since moving here (outside of the church, that is) have turned into polite acquaintance. I guess to some extent that is bound to happen. But what I am struggling to come to grips with is how I've approached these friendships. How did I (do I) allow the Lord to speak through me, shine through me, in these friendships? When opportunities arose (arise), how did (do) I make the most of them?
To put it plainly, I am not earnest when it comes to sharing the gospel message of God's love to others. This is a difficult admittance, even to myself. I can effectively teach the Bible to believers, proclaim God's love in song, exhort God's people to worship. But, unless an obvious opportunity to share my faith to an unbeliever presents itself, I don't. Instead of creating opportunities, I wait for them. And it is in simply waiting that nothing happens. As believers, we are encouraged to "pray without ceasing" (1 Thess. 5:17). But that does not always mean to pray and just sit and wait. Sometimes, it does. But other times, and more often, it means to pray while simultaneously allowing God to work in us and through us; and in doing so our very attitude and conduct become God's answer to our prayers (Philippians 2:12).
But if I'm not earnest, nothing - really - will change.
St. Francis of Assisi is once quoted as saying: "Preach the gospel at all times. When necessary, use words." While I wholeheartedly agree with the motive and essence of this statement, I can't reduce words to secondary importance in the endeavor to preach the gospel. If I do, I will never learn to open my mouth but instead simply trust that my life alone will do all the preaching necessary for a person to understand salvation and God's love. But Jesus's very life, not only his words, teaches us otherwise. Both word and deed are of equal value when it comes to the Christian message; they go hand in hand. The Bible teaches us that "faith comes from hearing, and hearing by the word of Christ" (Romans 10:17).
So I'm left with this: I need to continue to pray, pray, pray...and move. I pray for opportunities, but I also need to create those opportunities. I need to make the phone call, write the message, send the text, take out for coffee or lunch or dinner, host a meal, etc.
Time to seriously invest my time and money in people who need to hear and know Christ.
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