Being a mom is ultimately (all things considered)...rewarding. Mischa has quickly become my heart. I can't explain a lot of the emotions I feel when she smiles, when I watch her chest rise and fall as she sleeps, when she babbles at me, when she's so tired while she's nursing that she falls asleep but won't let go of me, when she holds on (yes - she can hold on to stuff now!) to my shoulder as I carry her, when she's overtired but sleepy and restlessly rolls around and sticks her butt in the air; but one that permeates through all of them is happiness. She makes me happy. And I would, quite literally, give my life for her. In fact, perhaps a little bit of that happens every day. And I may have lamented that in the beginning, but not now. Life is even better with Mischa.
She's been reaching a lot of milestones recently. Just having turned 4 months not too long ago, she's already mastered rolling from her back to her tummy and officially sleeps on her tummy now. Like any parent who is warned not to let their child sleep on their tummy for fear of SIDS or suffocation, I would wake at the slightest sound in the monitor, enter her room to find her on her tummy, and flip her onto her back. Needless to say, that didn't last long as I quickly became exhausted from waking up 4-5 times a night to flip her. She found the position most comfortable for her and I needed to accept that. Plus, she started to sleep for longer stretches at night because of it. Ultimately, I gave up my desire to control the situation (after much praying and endless monitoring) and let her be. Now she's working on rolling back onto her back. She's done it a few times, surprising even herself at the feat, but napping has become 'roll-around-time' halfway through. She's hilarious.
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